Letting Go

24 May

I saw the movie, her, and it broke something inside of me.

In the beginning, I was curious. A movie about a relationship with an artificial intelligence. Seems odd, but intriguing. I wondered. What kind of story could this tell? Could it move me? 

I realized very quickly, however, that this story wasn’t just about creating a new kind of relationship. It was about ending one as well.

I started feeling antsy when I saw where the story was taking me. I couldn’t bear watching the momentary flashbacks of happier times, because they happen to me every so often. I didn’t want it to take me there, but it kept bringing me back.

That final scene hit me really deep. It pierced through some emotional dam inside of me. As he started to compose his farewell message, I couldn’t hold back my emotions, or my tears. It was so intense because it was personal. He had these feelings he desperately wanted to hold on to — the feelings he still had for her, and the regrets he had for not being able to make it work — but he was finally able to let her go.

And I didn’t want to.

I realized then, that what I had been struggling against was the exact point of the movie; that the premise of the story was just the vehicle to this moment all along.

It was what I needed to see.

Maybe it’s time for me to let go, too.

Dear Catherine,

I’ve been sitting here thinking about all the things I wanted to apologize to you for. All the pain we caused each other. Everything I put on you. Everything I needed you to be or needed you to say. I’m sorry for that.

I’ll always love you ’cause we grew up together and you helped make me who I am. I just wanted you to know there will be a piece of you in me always, and I’m grateful for that.

Whatever someone you become, and wherever you are in the world, I’m sending you love.

You’re my friend to the end.

Love, Theodore.



Posted by on May 24, 2015 in Life


Tags: , ,

2 responses to “Letting Go

  1. Braxwolf

    May 24, 2015 at 9:45 pm

    I know next to nothing about your situation. But reading this, I think you’re going to be ok. Best thoughts and prayers for you —


    • soulboundlife

      May 24, 2015 at 10:19 pm

      Thanks for your support, always. It means a lot. 🙂



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